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Home > Wedding Planning > Groom & Guests > Indian Wedding Guest Etiquette
Indian Wedding Guest Etiquette

So you just got an invitation to what seems like the 10th wedding this year. That's no reason to forget your manners. Remember to treat each wedding invitation uniquely.
 
The following tips will guide you in understanding what the bride and groom really want to say to you, but out of respect, will not. Follow these and you will be the perfect guest!

Four letters - R S V P.

A few letters that mean so much! Mark the deadline date on a calendar and make sure the card is in the mail on time. If you are unsure and cannot make a final decision by the set date, contact the couple to let them know. Once you have checked off the Yes or No, do not change your mind without informing the couple. If you say 2 people are coming, don't show up with a 3rd person at the reception!

Respect the Program

Remember that you are celebrating the greatest day in the lives of two people. Be respectful during the wedding ceremony and the reception program. South Asian weddings provide plenty of time for socializing so save the latest gossip for then!

Say No to Gift Recycling

Don't just take that old unopened silver-plated tea set to the wedding. Put some thought into your gift and always ask first if the couple has a registry. If they do, make sure your gift comes from there, unless it is cash or a gift certificate. If the invitation says no gifts, do not show up at the reception with a huge box. The last thing the couple wants is that tea set of yours that they will never use.

Know the Dress Code

Before any event make sure you find out what everyone is expected to wear. This may be something you can just assume for the wedding and reception, but it often gets tricky with events like the bridal shower. Ask a member of the wedding party in advance in order to avoid any awkwardness at the event.

Don't Outshine the Bride

Sure you want to look great and you may even be looking for your own Prince Charming, but make sure you don't upstage the bride. The last thing she wants to hear her guests talking about is how dressed up YOU are.

Be on Time

Granted, most South Asian events don't start on time but you'll see that this trend is slowly changing. Don't be so late that you walk in during the program and miss the father-daughter slow dance. You'll regret it later. Not to mention you may miss some appetizers!

Assigned Seating

If a wedding has assigned seating, don’t ignore it and follow your own rules. Remember that if you do not sit in your assigned seat, you are sitting in someone else's. This will only lead to confusion as the night progresses. Simply put, sit in your own seat!

Drink Responsibly

Sure, South Asian weddings are a time to celebrate and party. And after all, the bride and groom are often providing you with the alcohol to drink. But this does not mean that you should take advantage of the free booze and get trashed. The last thing the bride and groom want to see on their wedding video is a drunken guest taking over the dance floor. Drink within your limit and don't embarrass the couple or yourself.

Say Hello before Leaving!

With the large number of people that are invited to some weddings, it is often easy for the bride and groom to forget to say hello to some guests. Don't take this personally; make sure you steal a minute of their time to tell them how great they look and give them your blessings. They will appreciate your thoughts and won't have to regret not getting the chance to thank you for coming.

Enjoy Yourself!

You were invited to share in the joy of the newlywed couple, so enjoy every minute of it! Savor the food, mingle with new people, and most importantly, dance the night away! Nothing will make the couple happier than knowing that their guests had a great time.

 

[Article thumbnail photo by KSD Weddings Couture Photography]

  
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IWS TIP :  Buy or create a cardholder for your reception so no cards are lost or misplaced. . . . If you are having a Mehndi night, have your own mehndi started an hour before the guests arrive. . . . If you are having a traditional Sangeet and singing folk songs, create a booklet of songs so everyone can follow along. . . Schedule a hair and makeup trial at least 2 months prior to the wedding. . . Having your reception on a Friday or Sunday will significantly reduce your cost. . . Block off hotel rooms for your guests and let them know the hotel information in advance. . . Register in at least 2 different stores to accommodate all guests. . . . Create programs with a translation of your wedding ceremony. . . Create a specialty drink at your reception that goes with your theme or represents your honeymoon. . . Display your engagement pictures at your wedding or reception. . . Make sure your passport is renewed and you have a visa for your honeymoon if outside of the U.S. . . Set up an airline discount for your out-of-town guests . . . Have a final fitting with all wedding outfits and jewelry 2 weeks before the wedding. . . Have your engagement ring cleaned 1 week before the wedding for maximum sparkle. . . Prepare an emergency kit for the day of the wedding - read our article for details. . . Have a facial done a month before the wedding and again 2-3 days before. . . Have your manicure done before you have your mehndi done.

 

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